Room 839

It has been a difficult month. I want to share my struggles and realizations but I grapple with words and sentence construction. The physical battle has been tough but the mental battle, tougher. My faith has also been heavily tested. But today, as I look outside my hospital window and listen to the lyrics "teach me to trust in you with all of my heart, to lean not on my own understanding, 'cause i just forget you won't give me what i can't bear", I am reminded of the Lord's sovereignty. And, this Sunday's gospel (Bartimaeus' healing) reminds me of faith. I realize I am blind too, blinded by my fears. But, like Bartimaeus, I am not deaf nor mute. Like him, I hear about Jesus and shall shout, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!” And, I hope, like him, Jesus will tell me, "Your faith has healed you."