Blessed to be 100 days old!

August 26 and 31, 2019

I wrote these journal entries in my hospital room. I just survived severe pneumonia and was supposed to continue my chemotherapy, but we found out that it was not working anymore. We were given the options of a different high dose chemotherapy or a new drug for clinical trial. A plan for a future stem cell transplant was also opened up. For the mean time, I was to undergo a stent insertion because my right kidney was enlarged and swollen due to two tumors.

Reading them brings me to tears because I am reminded of my brokenness and of God's faithfulness.

It was a dark, fearful period. I was desperately seeking and begging God. I was spiritually on my knees. A stark contrast to the present!

August 25, 2020

Hence, I find it supernatural and timely that today, almost exactly a year after, I am celebrating a milestone, my 100th day post stem cell transplant. Oh, how faithful is our God! He is a way maker, a miracle worker, a promise keeper, a light in the darkness!

I wanted to keep this between me and God because it was an intimate moment. But I was encouraged to witness, to exalt Jesus' name!

Finally, I recently learned that my real battle with cancer is not of physical death but of fears. Cancer is not going to take me away sooner than when God intends to take me home. God has already numbered my days. So, I must not let my fears cripple me and my mission. With Jesus, I hope to rise above these fears so I will be able to fulfill what God wants to do in me and through me.